Constrained

I look forward to the day when I can face you,

Find you and fill you in with my thoughts and dreams.

I look after the time when I can sit with you,

Pour out my heart's content page by page.

Until that day, I'll patiently wait

But for now, I'm time-constrained.

Revamping for 2014

I had to muster up my courage to write again. It has been a long time since the last one. (Read a post back and you’ll see when I last wrote in here.) But things are happening really fast these days, and I need something that could slow me down a bit.

So, if you’ve accidentally passed by this page and took time to read this one, I invite you to join me as I begin another journey as a writer. (Okay, please know that I am not a professional writer. This weblog contains mostly thoughts, and revelations from the Lord.)

mood nails

if they have mood rings... i have mood nails... hahaha... pictures to be posted soon! ^^,

graduation na nila...

habang karamihan ay nag-eenjoy na sa kanilang huling araw ng klase... at ang iba naman ay naghahanda na para sa kanilang graduation - naghahanap ng magagarang damit na isusuot sa okasyong ito, masayang ipinapakita ang kanilang mga grad pics at iba pang picture mula sa kanilang baccalaureate mass, at marami pang iba... - ako ito, di pa alam kung paano tatapusin ang thesis na iprepresent na sa monday.

saglit lang naman ako dadaan dito dahil marami pa talaga ko dapat gawin... naalala ko lang ang word of encouragement ng isang kaibigan kagabi... sabi nya: "ui hannah, graduation ko na. ikaw?" [haha... peace tayo!] hehe... nung sinabi sa'kin yan... napangiti lang ako... ano naman ineexpect mong sabihin ko? kung ako ang magtatanong nyan, ano kaya ang mafifeel ng taong sinabihan ko? syempre para sa graduating students tulad ko na hindi pa final ang lahat, magkahalong pressure at excitement ang nararamdaman mo ngayon. gusto ko na rin naman grumaduate tulad niya. yun nga lang, malayo pa talaga ang graduation.

at... sabi nga ng institute secretary namin nung GA last week, "nothing is official and final until three days before the graduation" kasi dun pa lang ang university-wide deliberation. so that means... april 23 pa magiging official ang lahat!

wala naman akong magagawa ngayon kundi ipagkatiwala na lang sa Diyos ang natitira pang isang buwan bago ako "officially" grumaduate. at i-claim na ako'y tunay na gragraduate! yey! sa bagay, kailangan ko rin naman maging produktibong mamamayan ng Pilipinas pagkatapos ng graduation kaya mabuti na rin na mahaba haba pa ang aking paghahanda... haha.

buti na lang, graduation pa lang ang nakapagpapabagabag na bagay para sa akin ngayon. anu naman kaya ang susunod? LOL. (anu ba yan, minsan na lang ko magpost dito ganito pa nashare ko... hehe)

Help!... If you have a minute or two...

these are e-mails from my mom... we would appreciate if you can include my uncle, Angelito Salazar in your prayers... thanks!

10 MARCH 2009

Hello everyone!

Update on Diko/Tito Tatay: Crea is 1440 when normal is just 120. Bajet says only dialysis is the solution. Pls. pray for him and the kids also. Medyo hirap kalooban ko kasi ako ung katabi... and there's nothing i can do but pray. Last nite, after much prayer, pinuntahan ko sya to ask if he would like to have some pineaple juice. Tumango then i helped him drink it pero di naubos. I asked him if I could pray for him at PUMAYAG! (praise God!), so I did. Then I told him dapat labanan nya ang nararamdaman nya kasi maraming nagmamahal sa kanya. Personally told him, 'di ko kaya pag wala ka na rin'. Hope he heard it. His body is itchy and both foot are bulging. Color of his nails are unnatural. He was scratching his face and i offered him if i could scratch his back also and he allowed me. Parang (lolo) daddy when he was paralyzed, hirap kumilos at laging nakatitig na lang. Please pray for him...and tell ur friends too. I still belive that if we will all pray and believe that God will extend his life... HE CAN!. Love u all..

11 MARCH 2009

Diko is presently undergoing his first dialysis at Asian. Bajet is requesting us to pray that Diko will have the will to live... I think he really wants to live! Shouldered ng card ni diko up to the 10th session. Siguro we will just pray how to prepare for the nexts should there be a need. Am also planning to support him by making him takle INTRA, a food supplement. Pls. pray that God will reddem him once again and he will fully give his heart to God. Honestly, accdg to tatay banong, his chances for survival (if he will not undergo dialysis) is very nil... so at least pumayag sya.

With this, mga kapatid/anak/ pamangkin... let's start learning to eat right... "let's not allow this same incident happen again" to us in the future...

Madam, sorry missed ur call yesterday. There was another call which i also missed, number not registered. Have just replaced my old baterry kasi palpak na. Let's all pray that God who have extended Kuya's life... will do the same for diko... love u

God bless our family...

~~I'm currently miles away from them... so this (aside from prayer) is the only way i can do to extend my help... thanks so much! God bless you!

i miss...

... home...

- the sumptuous food we prepare every meal... healthy na, libre pa.
- my bed... with all my plush pillows, cuddly stuffed toys, comfy sheets and blanket...
- the unlimited internet access... where i could download and upload as long as i could...

- my loved ones...

how i wish i could go home soon....



[haha... ang drama daw ng blog post na ito... di naman ako masyado homesick... dulot lang ito ng wi-fi ng BK SNE na kainis kasi nagloloko...

"If you'll stand up for God, He stands up for you."

just a nice quote i'd like to keep posted for you to see...

may isa kasi akong blog post na tinanggal... hehe... naka-attach pa naman yang quote na yan dun. dami kasi naintriga dun sa blog post kaya tinanggal ko na.


so here... this is really it... Christmas break's really totally over... and whether we like it or not (whether i like it or not), it's time to get going... -whew- sana pwede ako humingi ng extension... or sana pwede patagalin ang oras... just so i'd have enough time to do things...


don't know where to begin... for senior, graduating students i think you know what i mean. for senior, graduating students and at the same time an active minister... i know you understand this better... for some, you may also be feeling the pressure as i do. it's as if sometimes i feel that the only thing i can do to relax is to take a deep breath, a really really deep breath... then go on again.


yes.. i am so excited to see what will happen after these things have passed. pero syempre now that i'm in this kind of thing... i kinda dunno what to do... delegate? can't.


tapos until now, i still can't get over with being torn between two worlds. hahaha... -whew-


so help me God. =/


~sa mga naabala dahil sa blog post na ito, pasensya na po... i just need some place to throw these. thanks!~

bakit nakakatamad???

hehe... i should be going to SM now. kaya lang parang mas gusto ko magstay sa dito sa hauz...

well then, i gotta go for a while.

losing 3 kilos in one week...

hehe... di ko inexpect...

God is just so amazing that He keeps on showing revelations and impressing burdens to my heart. haay... they're just so overwhelming din at times... but by the grace of God we can do things right, for His glory... and we can be overcomers...

haha... di ko kasi pwede ishare kung bakit ako pumayat... kaya eto na lang ishashare ko.

and also this thought i've read from a book:

"if you'll stand up for God, He stands up for you."

online forever no more...

Well, that's because I don't have wifi in the boarding house... and I seldom stay at home on weekends...

It has pros and cons though. I sometimes find it hard to connect with groupmates whenever we need some homeworks to do... and that's only one of the many things written on my list.

erm. I just wonder... will UP communtiy, I mean the whole of it, ever possibly be connected to the world wide web one of these days??? No... I mean sooner than next decade... haha... just a thought...

an option for the doxology...

Great is Thy Faithfulness - Cece Winans

Great is Thy faithfulness, O God my Father;
There is no shadow of turning with Thee;
Thou changest not, Thy compassions, they fail not;
As Thou hast been, Thou forever will be.

Refrain

Great is Thy faithfulness!
Great is Thy faithfulness!
Morning by morning new mercies I see.
All I have needed Thy hand hath provided;
Great is Thy faithfulness, Lord, unto me!

Summer and winter and springtime and harvest,
Sun, moon and stars in their courses above
Join with all nature in manifold witness
To Thy great faithfulness, mercy and love.

Refrain

Pardon for sin and a peace that endureth
Thine own dear presence to cheer and to guide;
Strength for today and bright hope for tomorrow,
Blessings all mine, with ten thousand beside!

Refrain

EXCELLENCE...

"Make it a habit to act excellently until it becomes part of the natural you."

- Passion for Excellence

just a thought...

do friendships have to be so complicated?

i believe it shouldn't complicate one's life... so what must be the problem if your friendship with someone gets quite complicated?

does it have to do with priorities? commitments? relationships?

-just a thought-
[to let go of what preoccupies my mind...]

idiosyncrasy

[id-ee-uh-sing-kruh-see]

noun, plural -sies.

1. a characteristic, habit, mannerism, or the like, that is peculiar to an individual.
2. the physical constitution peculiar to an individual.
3. a peculiarity of the physical or the mental constitution, esp. susceptibility toward drugs, food, etc.

- dictionary.com

do all of us have our personal peculiarities? haha... just came to my mind...

i do have a lot of idiosyncrasies... when i once told a friend of mine some of these unique [most are weird] behaviors i have, i found out she hasn't discovered hers yet... haha... and it made her begin to think of her idiosyncrasies as well...

influenced... hmmm... uh oh...

don't know if you know who you are... natawa lang ko nahahawa ka na yata sa mga trip ko... haha ^^

time...

... is gold
... is precious

... is what really i need right now...
... is the best partner for silence... serenity... peace... [for me right now]

last weekend...

well...

- last weekend was my first time to watch Mulan and Mulan 2. And i find the story really really inspiring... she did things BEYOND the real her so she could prove that she can bring honor to her family... and then to her country. [ako kaya? hmmm...]

- missed my good old friends and was glad to see them again...

- spent a quarter of my weekend at a friend's house then the rest, i spent in the church... it's quite tiring coz i hardly got sleep but it made my week coz that's what i kinda miss these days...

YESTERDAY...

- woke up early for an annual physical check-up at Makati [and just realized i kinda hate going to the doctor... kinda lang kasi minsan gusto ko rin magpadoctor... haha]

- ate an Indian vegetarian lunch with my parents at glorietta... [yumm!!! i kinda miss indian food as well... hehe... but i still miss chicken briyani kasi palak paneer (spinach and cottage cheese) ung kinain ko yesterday]

- watched My Sassy Girl with my family

- went to church supposedly to attend dance practice... but i ended planning dance costume for when you believe with mitch...

...THAT'S HOW I SPENT MY WEEKEND...

KAYA TODAY...

- eto ako, cramming mode again kasi tomorrow na ang deadline ng chapter 2 ng thesis...

- tapos nagkakaproblem pa kami sa costume kasi... haay... we need sponsors...

- i seem to look forward going home... -sigh-

When You Believe song lyrics - Mariah Carey

Many nights we've prayed
With no proof anyone could hear
In our hearts a hopeful song
We barely understood
Now we are not afraid
Although we know there's much to fear
We were moving mountains
Long before we knew we could

[Chorus:]
There can be miracles
When you believe
Though hope is frail
It's hard to kill
Who knows what miracles
You can achieve
When you believe
Somehow you will
You will when you believe

In this time of fear
When prayer so often proves in vain
Hope seemed like the summer birds
Too swiftly flown away
Yet now I'm standing here
My heart's so full, I can't explain
Seeking faith and speaking words
I never thought I'd say

[Chorus]

They don't always happen when you ask
And it's easy to give in to your fears
But when you're blinded by your pain
Can't see your way clear through the rain
A small, but still, resilient voice
Says help is very near

[Chorus]

miracles... miracles...

just a quotable quote i have learned today:

"miracles happen when you start to believe..."

haay... oo nga naman... i've been memorizing the song "When You Believe" for more than a month now... but the song's message hasn't really sunk into my heart until this afternoon.

we have only 19 days more to finish everything we need for our upcoming No Bounds Concert on August 22. Haay... kakapressure... but i believe God is teaching us to be more faithful.

we need to believe that God is still a God of miracles... and that He will surely make things happen...

[eto na naman ako... speechless na ulit... haha... back to study mode...]

",)

jerry...

bakit parang andami talagang pumipigil sakin magpost ng pics dito?
pati na rin gumamit ng PC?


before, trojan and friends hindered me to access multiply... now that hp and i are in good terms, dumating naman si ben/jerry...

huhu... can somebody help me understand what's goin on?




-if you really know what's goin on, you'll think i'm ridiculous.. haha-

-uh oh-

because it's been a long time since i last posted pictures on multiply, i have planned to do it today... however, just when i was about to post pictures, i realized that this laptop don't have the card reader that fits a Sony PRO Duo memory stick.

kainis pa kasi di ko lam kung PC ba ang may problem o ung connection namin kasi ayaw magconnect sa multiply... hmp.. anu ba yan!

-sigh-

kelan ko kaya mapopost ang santambak na larawang hanggang ngayon ay nasa 'memory sitck' pa rin [pasensya na di ko alam ang tagalog sa 'memory stick' eh.. haha..]

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and one thing more... my voice is not coming back yet... i still have what they call 'husky' voice... pero para sa'kin di naman talaga husky ang tawag sa boses ko... ito ay itago na lang natin sa tawag na 'stressed voice' ...haha... kasi nakukuha daw ang ganitong kalagayan sa sobrang pagod at puyat... siguro after effect din to ng EK weekend [see pictures for ref (soooon) namin last sunday at ng kuwentuhan sa bus with ate mhe [sa ilalim ng aircon na sobrang lakas... nahanginan ung bumbunan ko.. haha]

ang masasabi ko lang.....

ang hirap pala ng di makasalita... mas gusto mo dumaldal... haha...

*********

di din ako nakasayaw ngayon... tsk tsk tsk... kasi naman nagising ako kaninang 0300H na masakit talaga lalamunan ko... ung feeling mo lalagnatin ka na? ganun ung feeling ko... tapos 0553H nagising ulit ako, sinubukan magsalita pero mahirap pa rin... huhu...

yan tuloy, di na ko pinasayaw ni nanay... kelangan din ako gumaling agad kasi di pa ko tapos mag-OJT... at sasayaw ulit [sana] kami next week... bakit sana? kasi may new sched na ang worship team... kaya malamang may new sched rin kami...

*********

sana mahanap ko na ang 'notebook-slash-journal-slash-confidant' ko... ito ay huling natagpuan, martes, ika-22 ng Abril, sa carpet ng living room namin... uh oh talaga... la ko magawa... argh!

i guess i got to move on and start writing on a new journal... just as what i did today... haha...

*********

so ayan na lahat... sana kahit mahaba... la lang... to be continued...